Love

Whenever we love, we stumble upon something truly enigmatic. It is at once superficial, yet inexplicable: a "crush" will fall apart into oblivion, or perhaps instead turn into something quite different, what might be called an emotional investment. Marriage is an imprisoning social contract which some, with sufficient willpower, can break and by doing so, reforge their lives.

The only thing which makes love important, pragmatically speaking, is the consequence we have all come to expect and desire, for one reason or another: offspring. Undesired pregnancies abound, revealing that the mechanism of love is still performing its intended function. Does that not repulse you? Or does that fill you with awe? Perhaps a little of both.

But why should it be repulsing? The images in themselves have been tainted: the fluids, the taboo of pornography and blazing harshness of the raw flesh, reveal within us a cringing coward who dares not embrace the concept of sexuality. It is a silent thing that belongs to the night, unseen except by one secret companion. (or perhaps more than one?)

And yet then, why should it fill us with awe? Paradoxically for the very opposite reasons; we stand amazed at witnessing the act of creation, a soul of new innocence unfold into the complexity of the world. What was ugly in man has become beautiful in his child.

There are those who perhaps see the complete opposite for each; who admire adult human flesh, and hate the wailing of the newborn with passion.

Regardless of what you feel your reasons for these feelings to be, I suspect to some extent they exist in us all-- the duality of revulsion and awe at our own bodies, as well as concerning those of the desired sex. What next?

What is gained by love? What is lost by abstaining from it? These questions can only be answered by taking a path that cannot be easily returned by. Commitments are never easy to retreat from.

What is gained by abstaining from love? What is lost by pursuing it?
The same questions, inverted. But the same questions could be applied to any aspect of your life. How would your life have been different if you'd pursued politics instead of medicine? Public service instead of law? You would be different.

Pragmatically speaking, if you pursued love, you would likely have a child, and know what it is to be a parent.

If you did not, you would experience much more that you would never have had time for, had you taken care of a child instead.

We can think in terms of selfishness-- that a selfish man would obviously not pursue love. Only superficial love, love that satisfied his appetites, but not committing love that results in a family.

Why is this so important? Consider at least this. For every human being who has survived until adulthood, there have been those who have taken care of him. These humans performed the function of parents. Do you want to know what the experience of this function is like? Do you have any idea of how it would feel? The emotions that would course through you? You do not, at least, not until you perform that function.

What does it mean to be human? Is it to philosophize? Not at all. Philosophy only becomes an interest when all other avenues are exhausted. It is defined as ultimatum. Being human is far more inevitable. We feel the call night and day. We see children and families together all the time. That is the pressure pushing us towards this continuation.

One could choose not to be human, to make goals and destinies for himself that do not include love. This man would not be human. He would accomplish things I would probably characterize as inhuman. Is that bad? I cannot say. It is another question. All I can say is that neither path looks particularly appealing at the moment. That is a frightening thought.